HOPE.
My mother was a single parent who raised me on her own from when I was about six years old. My parents divorced and my father was unavailable throughout much of my childhood as a result of his struggles with alcohol and drug abuse and being in and out of prison.
I witnessed my mother’s commitment to both providing a good life for me and also taking steps toward bettering her future by attending college and pursuing a career. After only a few short years relying on social assistance, she was able to financially provide for us on her own.
She worked very hard as a young mom to provide a secure, stable, and healthy foundation for me and to provide as many opportunities as possible. Because of her efforts I found my passion for competitive sports and academics at a young age and I acquired some important life skills that would carry me through to adulthood.
She instilled the values of humility, discipline, generosity, and hard work. My mother sacrificed her 20s and most of her 30s to ensure I had the best opportunities, many of which she didn’t have as a young, single mother. I am forever grateful for that.
Now as a mother myself to a precious almost 5-year-old boy, I appreciate my mom and the sacrifices she made for me even more. I understand the challenges of motherhood and appreciate how much time, energy, money, and intention it takes to raise a child. I struggle on most days to manage and balance it all, I can’t imagine mothering on my own, the way she did.
This is why I’m so passionate about inspiring hope for single mothers and their children.
On November 2nd we launched our 2nd annual Hope Campaign in support of a beautiful local charity based in Edmonton, Alberta that is doing meaningful and impactful work for single mothers and their children in the community, The Kaleo Collective.
The Kaleo Collective is a safe, supportive, and inclusive community for single mothers who are determined to build a secure and healthy foundation for their lives and, in turn, for their children. They welcome and support all single mothers who desire to be a part of their membership regardless of age, color, creed, religion, or orientation.
At The Grief and Trauma Healing Centre, we believe that a healthy and sustainable future is built upon healing intergenerational grief and trauma in families. Together, we aim to help break the cycles of emotional and financial poverty for these families.
Our campaign goal is to raise $5000. All proceeds from The Hope Campaign will go toward funding counselling services for the single mothers and children of Kaleo Collective.
This campaign honours all single mothers out there who work hard, sacrifice so much for their children, and do it all without any expectation of acknowledgement.
We see you.
We honour those mothers who are widowed and are left to pick up the pieces for their families after their partner has died.
We honour those mothers who have left unhealthy, abusive, or toxic relationships to start over.
We honour those mothers who are newcomers and their partner has not been able to leave their home country.
We honour those mothers who are military or oilfield wives and are often left to parent alone while their partner is away.
We honour those mothers who had a partner that didn’t want the relationship to continue.
We honour those mothers who had a partner who chose not to be a parent in their child’s life.
We honour those mothers who were raped and chose to keep their child.
We honour those mothers who chose to have a child on their own.
We honour those mothers who took on a child that wasn’t their own to help out a family member who is unable to parent.
And we honour those mothers who are solo parenting for any other circumstance.
Why is HOPE so important?
There are many definitions and interpretations of what it means to hope.
According to Wikipedia, “hope is an optimistic state of mind that is based on an expectation of positive outcomes with respect to events and circumstances in one's life or the world at large. As a verb, its definitions include: "expect with confidence" and "to cherish a desire with anticipation." It is an anticipatory emotion.”
I love this description of hope - to expect with confidence - because it represents a positive connection to the future. It represents possibility.
I like to describe hope as something that cannot be seen in our present circumstances, but rather it is an unseen concept that lies ahead.
One of my favourite bible verses is, Romans 8:25, “So because our hope is set on what is yet to be seen, we patiently keep on waiting for its fulfillment.”
This anticipatory hope represents the possibility of healing, growth, change, and transformation. It provides the courage to step into fear, vulnerability, and uncertainty for a better tomorrow.
It is a reminder that our circumstances, our emotions, and our struggles today do not define what tomorrow will bring.
Sometimes our “24-hour hope” is the only thing that keeps us going and moving forward when we’re going through a difficult or painful time. And every day, we choose hope again and again until things start to change and our days become brighter.
Where would we be without hope?
Hope is what anchored me when my dad died by suicide in 2010. When I felt completely alone and afraid in my suffering, hope was the only thing I had to hold onto to get through another day. I didn’t even realize it was hope that kept me going at the time. But I knew somehow, someway, this wasn’t the end of my story.
And I know for many of the single mothers that Kaleo serves, hope is the only anchor they have when times are tough. The 5 beautiful women of Kaleo who graciously and willingly shared their stories with us demonstrate the power of hope in circumstances that otherwise felt dark, uncertain, and overwhelming.
Hope is truly an invitation to keep moving forward, one day at a time.
What does hope mean for you?
For me, hope is found in sharing my story, serving others, listening to worship music, writing letters to Jesus, running outdoors, connecting with my husband and son, and trusting God’s leading in my life.
For others, hope may be found in a conversation with a friend, in an inspiring book, in nature or travel, in a support group, in yoga or meditation, in exercise, in volunteering, in working with a therapist, in journalling or painting, in spending time with loved ones, or in any other action, belief, or experience that represents possibility for a brighter future.
By supporting The Hope Campaign, you are supporting the single mothers and children of Kaleo and funding their access to counselling services to heal from the pain of their past and move forward with renewed hope in their hearts.
Please help us raise $5000 for Kaleo by:
Be sure to follow our hope journey on our Instagram page @griefandtraumahealingcentre to witness the impact that Kaleo has on the community of women they serve! Throughout the month you will hear the 5 inspiring stories of hope shared by the mothers of Kaleo.
And if you want to learn more about why Layna Haley, the Founder of The Kaleo Collective, started this charity in the first place, including her journey as a single mother, hop onto our Instagram LIVE on November 26th at 4pm MT on our Instagram page! She has a powerful and beautiful story behind her passion for serving single mothers.
Thank you so much for your support in spreading hope and healing throughout our community!
“Hope sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible.” - Mother Teresa
In Love and Service,
Ashley Mielke
Blog Written by Ashley Mielke
Ashley Mielke is a Registered Psychologist, Advanced Certified Grief Recovery Specialist, and Founder and Executive Director of The Grief and Trauma Healing Centre. She is also the exclusive Canadian Certification Trainer for The Grief Recovery Institute and a sought-after international speaker and consultant. Ashley was honoured to be named as one of Edify’s Top 40 Under 40 Class of 2021.
Ashley has led workshops and training events for multi-million-dollar corporations, professional associations, non-profits, the City of Edmonton, the Government of Canada, Federal Penitentiaries, and numerous small businesses. Ashley is currently obtaining her Doctor of Psychology degree (PsyD) through California Southern University.
Ashley found her passion early in life following a difficult childhood overshadowed by her father’s substance abuse and eventual suicide. Surprisingly, Ashley came to discover that her darkest and most painful period of life, was in fact, the very catalyst that uncovered her “WHY” for being: to serve others and create a safe space to explore life’s most challenging questions. Ashley is a heart-centred and purpose-driven leader who instils hope and healing through her story of resilience. Ashley’s greatest empowerment comes when she is able to connect with others and help them find the resilience of hope that can empower them—the hope that can only be found in the midst of great challenges and journeys through grief.